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The Full Mind Weigh® to Lifelong Weight Management, a program of the Institute for Lifelong Weight Management – teaching you the skills you need to keep the weight off forever!

But I Don’t Want To….!

Is there a part of you that screams inwardly, in frustration and in protest, when you consider the idea of change? Are you inwardly stomping your foot and having a tantrum? Change can be difficult, can be threatening, and pushes us out of our comfort zone. It’s normal to resist it.


We fear the unknown.

We struggle to answer these questions: “What will I do instead of… (our usual behavior)? How will I cope with… (substitute any life stressor here) without (substitute the old coping strategy here)?”

We may have difficulty trusting the source that is telling us to change.

We may have trouble with flexibility due to our existing personality type.

We may be at a point in our lives where we just have a lot going on, and can barely process the idea of taking on yet another challenge or any more stress.

We may fear a loss of control, should we embrace change with its unknown outcome.

We may be particularly attached to an existing habit, or an old way of doing things, for complex emotional, psychological, or sentimental reasons.

We may fear that we don’t have the skills to handle the change.

We may resent the idea of change if we feel it’s being imposed on us by someone or something else.

We may not fully understand the reason for the change, or its potential benefits.


Focus on what you might gain – not on what you’d lose.

Do a cost-benefit analysis (refer to one of my previous blog posts for the details:

Remember how you successfully negotiated challenging changes in the past – and what you gained from doing so.

Turn “I don’t want to” into “I want to”. Here’s are some examples:

I want to cut my fast food consumption in half because I want to decrease my cholesterol, blood pressure, and blood sugar.

I want to exercise 3 times a week because I want to maintain my flexibility and mobility for the rest of my life.

I want to increase my consumption of fruits and vegetables because I want to have better health.

I want to lose my excess weight because I want to fit into my favorite clothes again.

I want to decrease my consumption of fast foods because I want to live as long as possible, in good health.

I want to drink more water because I want my skin to glow and my hair to shine.

Get the idea?

Ditch your inner sergeant major and instead compassionately remind yourself that you deserve better health, and all the other benefits noted above. Stop telling yourself things like, “Don’t eat that because you’ll gain weight” and instead tell yourself things like, “Don’t eat that because you deserve the best of health”, or “Don’t eat that because your heart will thank you for saying ‘no’”, or “Don’t eat that because your joints would prefer you to make a different choice”.

“A year from now you will wish you had started today.” – Karen Lamb

“You miss 100 percent of the shots you never take.” – Wayne Gretzky

“Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.” – Maria Robinson

“By changing nothing, nothing changes.” – Tony Robbins

To learn more about effective weight management strategies, join my next weight management class, The Full Mind Weigh® to Lifelong Weight Management. For details, visit

For frequent updates on this topic and related topics on weight management and motivation, follow me on Facebook and on Pinterest: Institute for Lifelong Weight Management; On Twitter and Instagram: InstituteForLWM.

Join me for my 2-hour workshop on Tuesday, February 24th, “The 7 Habits of Highly Successful Losers”. For details and to register, email me:

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With your continued health in mind,

Doreen Lerner, Ph.D.

Director, Institute for Lifelong Weight Management

Creator, The Full Mind Weigh® to Lifelong Weight Management

The Institute for Lifelong Weight Management provides education and training. The Full Mind Weigh® is strictly an educational program and is not a substitute for medical or psychological evaluation or treatment. If you think you may be suffering from an eating disorder, please consult with a qualified mental health professional who is trained to evaluate and treat eating disorders.